Conundrum of Desire

I will begin with two poems I wrote. Enjoy and much luv!

Conundrum of Need

How can I

Ever blame you

Legitimately for not helping   for forsaking me?

Please consider, “How could you ever trust me when I have withheld desires?”

Conundrum of Connection

Harry loves Mary, and she’s aware

Emotionally he is fragile as fresh loose leaf–

Lethal when it leaves someone with a

Paper cut.

Meditate on Harry and Mary.

Everyone, how risky is it to be aware?

If this post speaks to you, please know that you are not alone. Do you face difficulty in expressing desire for help? “Yes,” the choir sings! Have you gauged what the difficulty is that is preventing you from using a helping hand this time? Some people go through the litany of responses, like “No, but yes, but you won’t understand, no I can’t just put my finger on it, yes the scalpel can curve it out but then something would be exposed.” Commonly as surgeons of our identity and fate, we have become skilled at dancing around the questions that make us the most vulnerable. Ultimately, your age, gender, race, religion, occupation, work experience, intelligence, etc. does not exempt you from needing a helping hand or responding to the question that sparks vulnerability, “Can I assist you with anything?”

Receiving a helping hand is similar to how our lungs cooperate with air. Though the quality of air matters tremendously, our lungs appreciate the ability to function and thrive on the opportunity to be functional , like how kids desire a gift at Christmas and how people strive to be wanted and needed by others. And fortunately, our lungs are wise; we can trust that they will communicate whether they are inhaling blessings or instant destruction for their entire body. Similar to how lungs aid us to breathe, a helping hand has the function of allowing a living organism to fulfill its Earthly and spiritual obligations, which are to be alive and work. Does this train of thought aid an individual in becoming a little more receptive to a helping hand? I am not sure, but it is the effort that counts. Furthermore, as mentioned earlier, is it understood how the quality of the helping hand has a tremendous impact on the quality of life and productivity we are capable of demonstrating as we move forward? It may be totally understood, yet still ignored. And that is okay though. As a crawling infant completes his or her rites of passage in becoming a walker, people will become more inclined in completing the rites of passage of seeking and latching onto the helping hand.  An important component of the rites of passage of seeking and latching on to help is the vulnerability piece. If infants can get through their bumps and bruises as fragile and vulnerable as they are, so can we.

Concerning the quality of the helping hand, I find it wise to select helping hands that are driven by agape love rather than hidden agendas. It is my desire that we recognize that there are helping hands waiting for us to latch on to. Please note that even your own hands qualify as helping hands for yourself. By waking up and loving yourself until you find more support is an act of giving yourself a helping hand. For those who are rightfully cynical, I have considered your rationale. Addressing complacency and conformity concerning this matter is needed. Here are statements I have heard from some cynics: “My daddy, my mother, my uncle, my aunt, etc did not make it an habit to ask for help, so this explains…”; or “There are so many odds stacked up against me that prevent me seeking help or anyone helping me, therefore why make the effort.” In the first example, it reminds me of a verse that sounds like this, “People perish, without a vision.” Due to some individuals’ internal and external factors, specifically their personality or their household/community, they excuse themselves because of handling being vulnerable well. As mentioned earlier, although “people [can] perish without a vision,” some people should just be tired of being a statistic that does not represent him/herself or their community well. Concerning the second example, I am reminded of the times where my own problems have distracted me from doing anything about them. In both cases presented, here are my two nuggets that can keep you from becoming another statistic: First, please realize that “We do not have to conform to the choices of our relatives or be chained to their free will and not our own;” and second, please accept that “The world guarantees people two things: 1.) an individual will always have enemies; and 2.) despite his or her enemies, this same individual will always have someone who loves them even if they have not met these people of support yet. Using a comic book and American pol culture reference, the infamous Batman is known for having his fan club. Even his counterpart, Joker the Nemesis of The Dark Knight, J-Man has his bestowed crew as well. In accepting that Help, at times, is only delayed, but always in the same stratosphere we dwell in, that leaves us with hope.

As I close, if you are not feeling a spiritual reference, I excuse you from the conversation at this point. I do not want spirituality to be a stumbling block from pondering how the previous information could possibly impact your life positively. In love, thank you for tuning in as I construct a narrative that I, one day, can return to for guidance and hope. Lovely people, live well! When a helping hand is presented to you, take it so that you can get back to functioning effectively so that others may be blessed by you.

For individuals who have remained, this whole writing experience and subject matter have reminded me of how God gave Eve my rib and what that means to me as it pertains to this message. When pondering the whole process of getting an individual’s desire of help met, I have come to recognize how gut-wrenching it can be because of the vulnerability [openness], the risk, and of the gut wrenching courage needed to act. Every time I have expressed need, I have had to accept that I am giving a remnant of myself to the supporter, whether that remnant being a piece of my vulnerability, resources, or time and energy. Yet, reflecting on Adam and Eve, in rain and shine, they needed each other like yin and yang. Lungs need air. Most humans need sex. All humans need connections. All currency needs objects in which it can purchase. With all of these pairs existing in our universe, can we be a little more receptive that even in our prime time, we need helping hands. Likewise, even in our darkest hour, we need helping hands. Therefore, brothers and sisters, live well because you may be the helping hand someone near you may need. Lovely people, live well! When a helping hand is presented to you, take it so that you can get back to functioning effectively so that others may be blessed by you. Do not be the “holier than thou” individual; but instead, be and remain a “child of God.” When has a child ever refused help, when they have humbled themselves and noticed their need?

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